I remember life as a child feeling very whimsical. Laying on the lounge and chatting with the “dust fairies” in the sunshine, seemingly oblivious to the dysfunction around me. I learnt very early to disassociate from my trauma and have few long term memories. I do remember feeling very sad and lonely, struggling with anxiety and having to grow up very quickly. I carried the huge load right into my early 30’s, I was extremely shy and introverted. I was a people pleaser, work-a-holic and did what ever I could to gain others approval, avoid conflict and stay on the right side of people in order to keep my nerves intact. Even to the detriment of my young family.
In my early 30’s something inside me snapped. I completely broke down and literally pulled the rug out from under everything that was, including my marriage. I was ready to start again. I was done and couldn’t exist in this way any longer. It was at this time I knew I had to get to work on myself.
I went within to heal, I read every self help book I could get my hands on in order to better understand myself and sought out some beautiful healers to help me shine a light on myself and crack open the possibilities. During this time, I also began to understand and tune in to my mis-understood spiritual gifts that were always there and ultimately went on a journey of self healing and growth. I moved into a space of being super spiritual before learning to ground myself in my humanness.
My husband Troy also went on his own healing journey, working through his own childhood trauma. We rekindled our relationship and united in strength, in a brand new way, understanding that strong, yet nurturing and loving communication is paramount in any relationship.
Over that time, I wound back my bookkeeping business so that I could follow a new path. I started turning my attention toward learning various healing modalities as well as teaching monthly wholefood cooking classes to various community groups. I began to homeschool my children and intentionally created a slower life.
With this slowing down, I felt increasingly guided as to how I needed to show up. Learning to trust… I ‘knew’ that those coming into my life were for many reasons. Some came with empowering messages and some with big lessons too. During this time, I began facilitating healing women’s circles, as well as seeing private clients for reiki sessions. I was collaborating with friends to bring day retreats and loved the life I was creating. Then in 2019 I facilitated at the Fearless Women’s Forest Gathering where I met Carolyne. I knew at this point something big was coming. I just had to wait another six months to find out what…
My journey, just like yours is always unfolding and evolving. I am always learning and growing through the experiences life throws toward me and am excited for the unity, community and the oneness to come.
With much love, Michelle x
